Marriages

Marriages

We're pleased you are thinking about Christian marriage. We want to help you have not just a day to remember, but very many happy days of married life.

However, we live in the real world and we know that it's becoming harder all the time to keep a marriage strong. That's why we want to help you to build a good, firm bond between you which will remain strong for many years to come.

We think that the best time to start building that strong bond isn't on the wedding day, but right now! The promises which you make on the special day are very important, but they aren't the whole story! We would very much like to help you to think through some of the main issues about marriage in the months leading up to your wedding.

What is marriage?

We take very seriously the words of Jesus, that marriage is a lasting union between one man and one woman which, in an ideal world, will last for the whole time both partners are alive. Marriage is about companionship, where there is real giving and receiving, helping and being helped, caring and being cared for. Each of you is wholly committed to caring for and looking after the interests of the other.

Why get married?

Marriage is a lifelong commitment. Commitment means promises - which are to be kept. So it is only right there are promises to love and cherish for life, in good times and bad times alike. In cohabitation, there is no similar need for commitment. Either one of the couple can leave when they like. Marriage is completely different, because the idea of being together is taken very seriously. In the church, we think that you've got to be that serious about marriage if you are to stay together. We also think that kind of committed relationship is the one in which children are most likely to thrive.

Who can get married at Cardross Parish Church

The policy of the Church is to marry anyone who is a member of the church or a son or daughter of a member, or anyone who lives within the parish. You don't have to be a member of the church to be married in church. However, as we have already said, you want God to be involved if you are being married in a church and we are happy to let you have any further information you might wish.

If either of you has been married before, you must let the minister know. The minister may be prepared to marry those who have been married before, and this must be discussed fully.

Thinking about marriage …

It is a condition of being married in Cardross Parish Church that you meet up with the minister to discuss some of the main issues about being married, or you make some equivalent preparation. We insist on this because we take the idea of lasting lifelong commitment seriously, and we trust you also take it as seriously.

Marriage is a public act and so an official wedding is required. But there is no need for a huge event. A wedding is perfectly valid where there are two witnesses instead of 200, and it is equally a wedding in the sight of God. In the wedding service words are read from the Bible that "a man shall leave his father and mother and be united to his wife". The same holds true for brides who will also leave their parents and be united with their husband. Leaving families and close family ties is difficult, and it certainly doesn't mean that families should be ignored. But it does stress that the couple is the new unit. Loyalty to each other is important. That means putting your husband or wife first - even before what you want.

That certainly isn't easy and it takes a lot of patience and practice. Loyalty in this way affects the whole way we live our lives. For example, it affects the time we spend at work, or with our friends, or on the things that interest us. If these things (good as they are) mean that we are not putting our wife's interests or our husband's interests first then perhaps we need to think again.

God, I'm getting married!

God also has quite a bit to do with your wedding. You have asked to be married by a minister of the Christian church. You make your solemn promises to each other, and also before God. He sees whether you keep these promises in the years ahead. We also believe that God can help you, because he cares for you. You can come to him in worship, and you can talk to him in prayer. We would very much like to see you around Church, if you care to come. If you would like to learn more about the God of love we worship, just have a word with the minister.

Some examples of marriage vows

Before God
 and in the presence of our families and friends, 
I, ... ,
declare my love 
for you, ...
and I give myself to you as your husband/wife.
I promise you my love,
my loyalty, and my trust
 for as long as we both shall live.

In the presence of God, and these witnesses,
 I, ... , take you. ... , to be my wife/husband,
 I promise and covenant to be your loving, faithful and loyal husband/wife, as long as we shall both live.

Before Almighty God and these witnesses, 
I, ... , give myself as your husband/wife,
and take you, ... , as my wife/husband.
 All that I am I give you,
 all that I have I share with you,
 I will love you, and stand by you for the rest of my life.

In the presence of God, our families and friends, 
I, ... , declare my love for you, ...,
 I promise you my love, my loyalty and my trust,
 as long as we shall live.

Other relevant information

Photography: Flash photography is not permitted during the service. Videos may be set up with the minister's permission.

Schedule: Please ensure you have a correct marriage schedule completed before the wedding day and available for the minister. This is available from the local Registry Office in Helensburgh on 01436 658822.

Further information (the small print): There is no charge for the services of the minister and use of church for members is free.

Cardross Parish Church has agreed the following charges.


Use of the church building:
 Church Officer fee: £ Organist fee: Bell ringer fee: